no idle talk

Brady Smith, on tagging along with his father to the meetings of his parish’s men’s group in the 90s:

[T]he Holy Name Society didn’t engage all that much with “manliness” as it is often defined today. Some of the men had actually seen war and had no interest in military cosplay. There were plenty of hunters, but they used shotguns or muzzleloaders rather than AR-15s. Their trucks were small, and more often they drove sedans. […]

Instead, for this group, the work of “manliness” was almost boring. They organized food drives, helped raise funds for the church and saw to the broader needs of our community, whatever those happened to be. The purpose of the Holy Name Society was to help all of us be good servants — to spouses, children, parents and communities.

In the context of Catholicism, there is nothing particularly notable about this idea. To be a man in the church is to be a good servant leader, someone who models Christlike values of humility and sacrifice in the service of the greater good. In our community, it was no idle talk, either. I had more than a few male role models who did things like teach and coach while their wives made most of the money. Closer to home, my father and grandfather spent a lot of time volunteering on Habitat for Humanity projects or ferrying neighbors to and from doctor’s appointments.